Reflections Upon a Miracle
It has been now 10 weeks and 12 days since the glorious day of my son’s birth and today I am finally getting a chance to write about it. Though it is weeks since the birth, I have truly taken time to reflect upon it and the stretch of time before writing has provided space and quiet to truly come to understand this dharma and what the situation is providing in my life as a whole.
Looking back upon the path that has led me here, and brought forth this child, I begin to realize how sacred my steps have been. From the beginning I had felt his presence and yet on many occasions he would not come forth in the past circumstances of my life. It was only now, at 33 at this time in history that this being became manifest. I see it as significant.
My pregnancy I can say was splendid. In fact I almost miss being pregnant! It was so easy I could hardly believe it. I never once was ill, I did not get morning sickness, I was not tired, and I had not one health issue come up. In fact I worked and taught class right up until his birth. I taught class Wednesday and planned to be there Friday, and then I went into labor that evening. I felt supremely capable while I was pregnant as if nothing could stop me from being happy. I ate very well and I took great care of myself. I did allot of Rebirthing (some privately), I meditated, I did Yoga, I sang and chanted, I did self massage, and I communed with nature as much as possible in the grass and the forest. I was also active socially. I worked part time at a massage studio and taught 10 Yoga classes per week during the pregnancy and it did not feel like stress. In fact I was able to be clear and even continue some basic Thai Massage in the last days with some very close clients. I felt like the pregnancy was truly a time of grace mirroring what was to come.
My husband Yohann and I have shared so much! From the time we met almost three years ago our love has grown and grown and we have come to be very best friends. With such different life paths, we have so much to share. Having him come here to the United States to spend the entire pregnancy with me was a manifestation of supreme proportions. He didn’t work at all so he was able to be with me the whole time day and night and provide all the care that I needed and attend every appointment. We picked out every baby item together. I am grateful for him. He and his family are blessed people, and despite the sometimes language barrier French to English, we do communicate very well in love.
After the nine months of pregnancy bliss I was very excited to move towards the birth. Bodhi’s due date fell exactly on Rosh Hashanah September 29th, a very sacred holiday, so we were afraid that we might lose our Midwife. The High Holiday was important to her, and we discussed the possibility of having to find someone to stand in for her. We just breathed and knew that it would work out perfectly. Two weeks before Bodhi was born someone sent me the most interesting information that I found so very fascinating and inspiring.
Chapter 12 Revelations
2:1 A great sign was seen in heaven: a woman clothed with the sun, and the moon under her feet, and on her head a crown of twelve stars.
12:2 She was with child. She cried out in pain, laboring to give birth.
12:3 Another sign was seen in heaven. Behold, a great red dragon, having seven heads and ten horns, and on his heads seven crowns.
12:4 His tail drew one third of the stars of the sky, and threw them to the earth. The dragon stood before the woman who was about to give birth, so that when she gave birth he might devour her child.
12:5 She gave birth to a son, a male child, who is to rule all the nations with a rod of iron. Her child was caught up to God, and to his throne.
I liked to read this info and ponder what significance it might have upon Bodhi’s coming, though I knew few children are ever born exactly on their due date. We just sat and waited.
The more significant event to me about Bodhi’s birth was that it was going to fall within a few days of the Cosmic Convergence. If you have read my prior blog about his conception being specifically linked to this event, then you might be as blown away as we were that he was actually going to come at this time. With all of the extreme blessings bestowed in his conception we were just dumbfounded that this novelty would present itself that perhaps Bodhi might be born on the Cosmic Convergence! And we were shocked that his due date was that week.
Cosmic Convergence: http://www.calleman.com/content/articles/CosmicConvergenceSeptember23-26.htm
We were told by some of our guides that this was a very special time to have the baby since there was a comet ElLenin which was going to pass by Earth on the 25th and that this comet was the true bestowal of the ‘Golden Age.’ Again I was flabbergasted. I followed ElLenin as it was approaching and we prayed and meditated on the high holy time and the approaching of the Cosmic Convergence. I myself have been working with these energies for many years as these massive astrological events have approached.
I was prepared for Bodhi to enter at any moment. On September 23 I began to have my first contractions. As we entered the moment of the Cosmic Convergence somehow my body moved with it. I began to feel the first contraction (or I liked to call it an ‘opening’) Friday the 23rd in the morning. I was thinking, can this be the time??? REALLY? As the day progressed I felt more contractions. They began at 20 minutes apart. I started to time them almost right away. They were like clockwork. It went slowly to 10 minutes apart by about 9:00PM Friday the 23rd of September. I did not sleep but instead I spent time in my Yoga room/Nursery breathing and stretching, praying, and chanting. I took several warm baths and I ate very well including Raw Honey, Mango, Banana, Pistachios, and Almond Milk. I kept it light. The daybreak Saturday was a splendid experience and by then I had been in contractions slowly for almost 24 hours.
In terms of the ‘contractions’ what I was experiencing was more like a wave. Something otherworldly like a rush of adrenaline beginning at my toes and moving up my body until it overtook me completely. It was not necessarily ‘pain’ but it surely was what I would call ‘uncomfortable.’ I remained in this 10 minute apart contraction pattern like clockwork throughout Saturday. I worried, I had heard that some people experience contractions that are not labor and I prayed that this would not go on for days on end. But then Saturday at about 3:30 my contractions moved to 9 minutes. While this was not exactly a sign of labor I was happy to see progress. I stayed at home and between 3:00 and 7:00PM the contractions slowly moved to 7 minutes apart. As this time approached I was prepared that this was going to be the time. I put myself in my prayer shawls and began to say my mantra between each contraction as the waves came. I took hotter baths and more honey, I sat with crystals, I prayed, and I talked with Yohann who was preparing for the labor to stop versus continue. At 7:30PM the contractions moved to 6 minutes and I called Ronni Rothman my midwife and told her that we might be in labor tonight. She stood by. Since I was giving birth in a birthing center, it is so much like home that you just basically stay at home until the contractions are 4 minutes apart. I labored at home with ease, moving into the flows with joy and grace. I was aware that the Cosmic Convergence was in full swing and our guides were telling us that this was a really important time! The comet ElLenin was approaching Earth at this very moment. Finally at about 11:00PM I called Ronni and told Yohann NOW is the time the contractions are 4 minutes apart. It was easy, there was no struggle, no yelling, I timed the contractions between my mantras and prayers, Yohann sat quietly. At about midnight I called Ronni and she said “Sati get in here now or you are going to have this baby at home!” I was almost going to stay at home, but I liked the idea of the large bathtub at the center so we headed off at 12:30PM. By this time I was having contractions since Friday morning and it was now Saturday night.
I never once questioned this process. I was not afraid that I needed to be ‘induced’ I was not thinking that I needed to speed up the process or cause anything to move faster. I just simply breathed and allowed the time to pass. Honestly it was incredible. I was excited and overjoyed! I could have stayed in labor for days. But, now at 1:00 we arrived at the birthing center with contractions 3 minutes apart.
Upon arrival…Ronni let me know that my water had not broken and that with this type of labor it could go on for much longer. I made the decision to intervene in the process only once and asked her to go ahead and break the water bag, this does not hurt at all… its just like a small crochet hook that ruptures it. Once the water broke finally Bodhi’s head descended and was upon the cervix she could see then that I was 8cm dilated. It was only a short time until his birth. I entered the water, feeling now the contractions intensify since the water was now broken and I entered full transition at this time. I spiraled my hips and decided that I could go no further. I was too tired. I asked to be taken to a hospital right away. In essence Ronni laughed in my face. She said that there was just no way that I needed that. Her exact words I believe were “You can push your baby out, if you go to a hospital they are going to cut the baby out and that is exactly why you chose me so that this would not happen.” I was belligerent in my transition I must say. I was really negative for about an hour. During this time the baby was being born. I didn’t curse or scream, but I had strong doubts. Claustrophobia came up in the water and I needed to move out of it for the actual birth. Yohann was so strong and silent the whole time, even without sleep he was his usual graceful self. I went onto the bed at about 3:00 to begin pushing. Yohann sat right behind me and held me up helping me to push in the last and final moments he was strong and silent with support that I never imagined I would have!! Bodhi was born one hour later.
The pushing phase was about two hours or less, but the labor itself was more like 48 hours. It was a steady climb…. Bo was born at about 4:45 Sunday morning September 25th one day into Libra giving him Libra sun and Virgo Moon and Rising.I am also happy that I manifested absolutely no birth complications at all. I was told I would most certainly get hemoroids, tear my perineum, suffer incontinence, among other things. But I am happy to say, NONE of them happened. I had bleeding and a small tear internally that Ronni said would suture with one stitch, and nothing else has manifested, my body has returned to normal almost immediately. I did bleed as suspected for 7 weeks straight however so that much is true. I returned to teaching six weeks after Bodhi’s birth and prior to that I just stayed in bed with him and my husband in awe of his graces.We did have to take the baby to the hospital sadly after two days as his temperature was extremely high, but they found nothing wrong with him and in fact we were told he was probably the healthiest baby in all of the Childrens Hospital. His temperature was high and remains high…. as he is a hot being!
Bodhi’s birth aligned to the comets passing, and fell directly in the center of the Cosmic Convergence. What this means exactly I can not know, but I do know that he is a cosmic being! His light is so bright and his smile is the radiance of the joy of the Universe. He is truly a supreme blessing to this world.
I can say with 100% honesty that I am in totally BLISS every single day with this baby! He is the light of my life. I don’t want to miss a moment of him, he sleeps right next to me and we are inseparable when I am not teaching Yoga and then he is with his incredible daddy! Yohann and I are SO in love and so in love with this little light being. I am truly blessed.